Of course, Santa is real! - Christmas Survival Guide for Parents

 

💙Why wouldn’t he be real? Who else is sending you your gifts?

He is not using a sleigh and reindeers to travel the world anymore, he uses Amazon Prime, FedEx, USPS, UPS and the other mailing services to deliver the presents. 

Haven't you seen how small our gas fireplace is? I don't even think that we have a normal chimney, it could be a small pipe. Can you imagine Santa getting stuck in the small pipe, he cannot even put his fist in it!

Most new houses don't have chimneys so there is no need for Santa to go to the houses anymore. Thanks to the new technology Santa works remote, just like me. 

He only has to show in person to the special events like the photo shoots at the mall.

💙Why are your gifts wrapped with the same wrapping paper that you saw in the pantry?

Because I wrapped them. 

Santa and his team told us that if they wrap the gifts before they send them the package wrap will get damaged in the mail, so we the parents have to do it now. 

Oh well... it is Ok though, I don't mind.

💙But why Santa does not come through the door, or the window, you are asking?

Santa is getting old now... he is 54. Even if he wanted to do the gift distribution in person, he gets too tired and needs to take naps. 

Back when he started this business, he was a 30 year old man. He was considered a grandpa because the life span was about 40 years and by 30 a man would have grandchildren already. But he was in great shape and could visit all the houses within one night! 

This is not the case any more. 

💙You wonder why you are not getting the gifts you wanted?

Because your "Naughty Score" is too high, honey. You have to keep the score as low as possible in order to get the gifts you really want.

💙How do I know about your Naughty Score?

Santa Clous' secretary told me your score. Her name is Snejanka.

She keeps all the records of how good and bad you were this year. It is all in her laptop. You school sends her your reports, tardiest, notifies her if you are missing homework... They tell her everything. 

So be mindful how you behave, please. Every time you say a bad word,  Alexa or Siri sends the record to Snejanka.